There could be a number of reasons why you’re not being understood.
Maybe the other person is distracted or doesn’t speak the same language as you. Perhaps you’re not communicating clearly or concisely enough. And, it’s also possible that the other person simply doesn’t understand the topic at hand.
If you’re struggling to be understood, it’s important to be patient and keep trying. Keep your communication clear and concise, and be willing to explain things in different ways if necessary.
In this article, you will discover how to end the struggle and be understood.
Why do we struggle to be understood
We all want to be understood. We want people to know our thoughts, our feelings, and our motives. But why is it so difficult to be understood?
There are a number of reasons why we struggle to be understood. One reason is that we often don’t take the time to explain ourselves clearly. We assume that others will just “get” what we’re trying to say, but that’s not always the case.
Another reason is that we have different ways of communicating. Some people are very verbal, while others are more visual or emotional in their communication style. This can lead to misunderstandings if we’re not attuned to the way the other person communicates.
Lastly, we all come from different backgrounds and have different experiences that shape the way we see the world. It is easy to assume everyone is on the same page, but it’s not. So, be a little bit patient when explaining things. Try to provide some context and background details for the other person first will definitely help the other person to understand you faster and easier.
How can I be more understood?
Fortunately, there are some things you can do to improve communication and be better understood. Here are a few tips:
1) Be clear and concise in your communication.
When it comes to communication, clarity is key. You want to make sure that your message is coming across as loud and clear. This can be difficult to do if you’re not used to communicating in a clear and concise manner. Here are a few tips to help you out:
- Stick to the point. Don’t try to communicate too much at once. Keep your message focused and on-topic.
- Avoid using jargon. If you’re using industry-specific terms or acronyms, make sure that your audience knows what they mean. Otherwise, you’ll risk losing them entirely.
- Be concise. This one can be tricky, but it’s important to remember that less is often more when it comes to communication. Try to get your point across in as few words as possible.
2) Listen attentively.
When we are trying to be understood, it is important to listen attentively. This means giving the speaker your full attention and not letting your mind wander. Try to focus on what they are saying and how they are saying it, rather than formulating your response in your head.
It can be difficult to do this, especially if we are anxious or feeling defensive. But if we can manage to really listen, it shows that we respect the other person and value their opinion. It can also help us to see things from their perspective and find common ground.
3) Repeat back what you’ve heard.
We’ve all been there. You’re in a meeting, or on a phone call, and the person you’re talking to isn’t quite following. Instead of getting frustrated, try repeating back what you’ve heard. This technique is called reflective listening, and it’s an incredibly effective way to ensure that you and the other person are on the same page.
When you reflect back on what you’ve heard, you’re essentially summarizing the conversation. This gives the other person a chance to clarify anything they may have misunderstood, and it also allows you to make sure that you understand what they’re saying. It’s a win-win!
So next time you find yourself in a situation where communication is struggling, give reflective listening a try. It just might help you get on the same page as the other person – and avoid any misunderstandings.
4) Be mindful of your tone and volume
In order to be better understood, it is important to be mindful of the tone and volume of your voice. When speaking with others, try to use a calm and clear tone so that your words are easily heard and interpreted correctly.
If you find yourself getting frustrated or feeling like you’re not being heard, take a step back and reassess the situation. It may be necessary to speak more slowly or ask the person if they can repeat what you said.
By remaining aware of how you’re coming across, you can avoid misunderstandings and ensure that communication is as effective as possible.
5) See things from the other person’s perspective.
It can be difficult to remember that other people have different perspectives than our own. We all see the world through our own lens, influenced by our experiences and beliefs. When we’re struggling to be understood, it can help to take a step back and try to see things from the other person’s perspective.
This can be a challenge, especially when we’re feeling upset or defensive. But it’s important to remember that the other person is just as entitled to their perspective as we are to ours. They may see things differently than we do, but that doesn’t make them wrong.
If we can try to understand where the other person is coming from, it can help us find common ground and resolve disagreements more easily. It may not be easy, but it’s always worth making the effort to see things from another point of view.
6) Ask clarifying questions.
When we’re struggling to be understood, it’s often because we’re not asking enough clarifying questions. If we want to be sure that we understand what someone is saying, it’s important to ask questions and repeat back what we’ve heard. This ensures that there are no misunderstandings and allows us to get clarification if we need it.
Asking questions also shows that we’re engaged in the conversation and interested in what the other person has to say. When we’re not asking questions, it can come across as disinterest or even rudeness. So, if you find yourself struggling to be understood, try asking more questions. It could make all the difference.
7) Pay attention to nonverbal cues like body language
In order to better understand how someone is feeling, it is important to pay attention to nonverbal cues in addition to the words that they are saying. This can be anything from the tone of their voice to their body language.
For example, someone who has crossed arms and has a tense expression on their face is likely feeling defensive or closed off. On the other hand, if someone is leaning toward you with an open posture, they are probably interested in what you have to say.
It can be helpful to practice reading people’s nonverbal cues so that you can better understand how they are feeling and respond accordingly. If you are not sure what someone’s cues mean, you can always ask them directly how they are feeling.
8) Provide more context during a conversation.
When we communicate, we rely heavily on the context of the conversation to provide clues about what we mean. If we’re talking about a shared experience, it’s easy to assume that the other person knows what we’re talking about and doesn’t need much explanation. But oftentimes, we find ourselves in conversations where the other person doesn’t have the same level of context as us.
In these cases, it’s important to provide more context so that the other person can understand what you’re saying. This means being specific about what you’re talking about and giving enough background information so that the other person can follow your train of thought.
If you’re struggling to be understood in a conversation, take a step back and assess how much context the other person has. If they don’t have much, take some time to fill them in so that they can better follow along.
9) Never assume people can read your mind
It can be frustrating when you feel like you’re not being understood. You may find yourself getting angry or upset, thinking that the other person should just know what you’re thinking. But the truth is, we can’t read minds. And even if we could, it’s not always accurate.
Assuming that others can read your mind can lead to a lot of misunderstandings and hurt feelings. It’s important to communicate openly and directly, especially when it comes to important topics. If you’re feeling frustrated, try to be more patient and explain the situation in full to the other person to see if you can be better understood.
Why do I feel the need to be understood?
We feel the need to be understood for a few reasons.
First, when you are not being understood, you feel isolated and alone. Second, you want to be able to share your thoughts and experiences with others without feeling like you’re being judged. Lastly, you want to feel like your thoughts and feelings matter.
When we don’t feel understood, we can feel like we’re the only ones going through whatever it is we’re going through. This can lead to loneliness. We may start to doubt ourselves and our ability to cope with whatever it is we’re dealing with.
How do you let go of the need to be understood?
It can be difficult to feel like you need to be understood all the time. You may feel like you need to explain yourself constantly or that people just don’t “get” you. However, it’s important to remember that not everyone needs to understand you and that’s okay. Here are a few ways to let go of the need to be understood:
1) Don’t try to force people to understand you.
If someone doesn’t understand your point of view, that’s okay. You don’t need to try and make them see things your way. Just let it go.
2) Stop overthinking things.
Overthinking can often make us more upset about things than we need to be. If someone doesn’t understand why you’re upset about something, instead of getting lost in your thoughts, just let it go and move on.
3) Improve your self-esteem
When you have sufficient self-esteem, you will become a more confident person overall. This helps you to remove the need to get validation from other people all the time. And, lastly, you can move the locus of control from a third party to yourself, and this will give you power in life.
What to do when no one understands your feelings
First, try to communicate your feelings in a clear and concise way. It may be helpful to write them down beforehand so that you can organize your thoughts. Be patient when explaining your feelings to others, and give them time to process what you’re saying.
Second, try to find someone who will listen to you without judgment. This could be a friend, family member, therapist, or any other support system. It’s important to have someone who will accept you for who you are and feel safe talking to you about anything.
Third, don’t give up if someone doesn’t understand your feelings right away. Everyone has a different perspective, and your job is to learn how to communicate effectively, so both of you can reach a common page faster.
A Word From Charismatic persona
The key to being understood is first understanding yourself. Once you know who you are and what you want, it becomes a lot easier to communicate that to others. It also becomes easier to see when someone isn’t really listening or trying to understand you.
Last but not least, you should remember that happiness always comes from within, and you do not need validation from a third party all the time to be happy.
Understanding this will remove your urge wanting to be understood, and help you to become a more confident and independent person.