When it comes to relationships, it’s important to recognize when things have gone too far. Being obsessed with someone can have serious consequences for both individuals involved and their relationship as a whole. Knowing the signs of an unhealthy obsession can help you manage your feelings and take steps toward a healthier connection.
In this article, we’ll discuss 14 dangerous signs that may indicate you’re overly obsessed with someone else. From extreme jealousy to complete dependency, these are behaviors that should not be ignored or taken lightly.
What Is Obsessive Love Disorder?
Obsessive love disorder (OLD) is a mental health condition that causes someone to become obsessed with one person they are in love with. It is sometimes referred to as “love addiction”, and can cause sufferers to be overly possessive and controlling of the person they are in love with. OLD has several symptoms that can affect an individual’s life significantly, including intrusive thoughts, jealousy, and rumination over their partner.
A person suffering from OLD might experience extreme highs when they feel close to their partner and lows when there is distance or conflict between them. They may go to great lengths to please or impress their significant other, even if it negatively impacts themselves or others around them. Other signs of obsessive love disorder include monitoring the whereabouts of the object of affection, stalking behavior, and extreme mood swings based on their relationship status.
14 Dangerous Signs Of Being Obsessed With Someone Obsession
It’s normal to feel a special connection with someone. But, when that connection spirals out of control and becomes an unhealthy obsession, it can quickly become dangerous. Being obsessed with someone can manifest in several different ways, including possessive behavior and intrusive thoughts.
If you or someone you know is exhibiting any of the following signs of being obsessed with someone, it’s important to get help as soon as possible.
1. Controlling Behaviour
Controlling behavior is one of the most common signs that you are becoming overly obsessed with someone and pushing away your friends and family in favor of spending all your time with them. Examples of controlling behavior include trying to dictate who they associate with, what they wear, or how they act around others.
Controlling someone’s cell phone use can also be a sign that you are too obsessed with them. Whether it’s checking their messages without permission or constantly demanding to know who is texting them, these behaviors signal that you have an unhealthy level of obsession with this person.
2. Excessive Jealousy
Excessive jealousy is another common sign of an obsession, as a person may be overly possessive or territorial about their loved one. They may become suspicious if they see them talking to other people, or get angry if their partner spends too much time away from them.
People who are obsessed with someone may also constantly check up on them and ask for excessive details about where they are going and who they are seeing. They might question their partner’s every move and become jealous if they make plans without them involved. An obsessive person might also feel threatened by anyone that pays attention to their partner or even just talks to them.
3. Intrusive thoughts
Intrusive thoughts can include constantly seeking validation from a person, analyzing every single interaction with them, or ruminating on what could have been different.
For example: if you are constantly thinking about how you could have said something differently in conversation with them, or worrying excessively that they don’t like you as much as you want them to; these are all indications of intrusive thoughts related to an obsession. You may also find yourself preoccupied with their schedule and whereabouts — wanting to know what they’re doing at all times and who they might be spending time with — this is another sign of an obsession.
4. Unrealistic Expectations
Having an obsession with someone can be a very powerful feeling, but it can also be unhealthy if taken too far. When someone is obsessed with another person, they may have unrealistic expectations that can lead to excessive stress and disappointment. Unrealistic expectations are one of the major signs of being obsessed with someone and should not be ignored.
When people are infatuated or in love, they often feel like their romantic partner is perfect in every way. This idea causes them to build up unrealistic expectations for the relationship which can lead to serious issues down the line when these expectations cannot be met. For example, a person might expect their partner to always agree with them and never challenge their beliefs or actions. Or, someone might think that if they just love a person enough then that will automatically secure their long-term commitment to their partner without any effort on their part.
5. Constant Contact
Obsession is a powerful emotion that can cause us to lose sight of reality and become focused on one person or thing. When it comes to being obsessed with someone, constant contact is often seen as a sign. Constant Contact can be defined as frequently texting, calling, or messaging the other person in an attempt to stay connected.
People who are obsessed with someone may feel compelled to check their messages and social media accounts several times a day for any updates from the person they are fixated upon. They may also go out of their way to initiate conversations with them, such as sending excessive text messages or leaving voicemails when there was no response from the other party initially.
This kind of behavior could be considered intrusive and overwhelming for some people because it shows an unhealthy level of interest in another individual.
6. Self-harming
Self-harming is a serious coping mechanism that is often used as an indicator of being overly obsessed with someone. People who are obsessively in love with another person will sometimes take drastic measures to alleviate their emotional distress, such as self-harming. This could manifest itself in the form of cutting, burning, hair pulling, or even excessive drinking or drug use as a means of numbing the feelings.
Self-harming behavior can be hard to recognize because it can be hidden from view and difficult to talk about. Pay attention to any sudden changes in an individual’s appearance and attitude; if they seem withdrawn or distracted, it could be a sign that they are struggling emotionally.
7. Neglect of self
Neglecting oneself is one of the most prominent signs of being obsessed with someone. It can be easy to become so wrapped up in another person that you forget to tend to your own needs, leading to an unhealthy lifestyle. For example, it may become difficult for you to find time for activities that once made you happy, such as spending time with friends or taking a yoga class. You may also begin to ignore basic needs such as showering regularly or eating nutritious meals.
Moreover, neglecting yourself may lead to feelings of guilt and depression due to not making enough time for yourself. This can further affect your obsession with the other person, resulting in a vicious cycle of self-neglect and over-investment in another individual.
8. Overwhelming emotions
Being obsessed with someone is marked by intense feelings and thoughts focused on them and little else. You might think about them constantly, spending hours daydreaming or fixating on the idea of being with them. The signs of being obsessed can range from harmless to harmful, so it’s important to recognize when your feelings have become unhealthy.
Obsessive emotions often come in the form of fear, insecurity, jealousy, or anger. If you find yourself worrying excessively about whether they still care for you or if they are seeing anyone else, these could be signs that your emotions have gone too far.
Similarly, obsessive jealousy can lead to checking their social media pages obsessively or getting angry if they spend time with other people instead of investing all their time in you.
9. Disrespect personal boundaries
One of the biggest signs of obsession is a disregard for personal boundaries. This can manifest in many different ways, such as constantly calling or texting, showing up unannounced, invading their space during conversations, or trying to control their decisions. It may also involve stalking or monitoring online activity without permission.
All of these behaviors indicate an unhealthy obsession that could potentially lead to further problems down the line if not addressed quickly.
10. Inability to focus
One significant telltale sign of obsession is an inability to focus on anything else besides the object of your affection. This could manifest in several different ways such as constantly daydreaming about them, having trouble concentrating on work or school tasks, and feeling distracted in general. For example, if you were working on a project for work but all you can think about is this person instead of what you’re doing then that could be a sign that you’re becoming too preoccupied with them.
It can also take form in more direct ways such as spending hours scrolling through their social media accounts or checking in with them frequently throughout the day even when they haven’t responded or asked for contact.
11. Unhealthy comparison
When someone is obsessing over another person, they often feel inadequate or incapable when compared to them. They may start to compare themselves in terms of body image, career success, intelligence, and other skills that the other person has that they do not possess. This feeling of inadequacy can be extremely damaging as it causes them to lose confidence in themselves and their abilities.
For example, if someone starts comparing their physical appearance with that of their partner and feels like they are not attractive enough for them, this can cause feelings such as insecurity and jealousy towards the person who they are obsessing over.
12. Extremely Clingy
One of the most common signs of an unhealthy obsession is clinginess. When obsessing over someone, people may become extremely needy and want constant attention from their love interest. This could mean sending multiple messages throughout the day, calling them often, and trying to arrange frequent dates or hangouts together. This behavior can come off as overwhelming or even suffocating to many people.
13. Mood swings
When someone is obsessed with another person, likely, their mood will quickly oscillate between elation and despair depending on how the other person behaves toward them. If they don’t get the response they hope for from the object of their obsession, they may become despondent or angry in a matter of seconds. In contrast, they could experience a sudden burst of joy if they receive positive reinforcement from this person in any way.
14. Willing to be treated unfairly
If you have feelings for someone but are willing to accept mistreatment or unfairness to be close to them, this could be a sign of obsession.
Examples of these types of behaviors include staying with someone who is constantly manipulative and disrespectful. You may feel like you need to stay with them no matter what, even if it means sacrificing your values or beliefs for them. They may also ignore any red flags they see early on in the relationship because they don’t want to risk losing the other person’s affection.
What causes you to obsessed with someone?
Several factors may contribute to an individual becoming obsessed with someone else. In some cases, the obsession may be rooted in the person’s insecurities and self-doubt; they might fixate on the individual they’re attracted to because they think this person will make them feel better about themselves or provide emotional stability. The power dynamics between two people also play a part; if one partner has more control than the other, feelings of obsession can start to develop.
Another common cause is having an underlying fear of being rejected or abandoned by the other person. This fear can cause people to become overly possessive and clingy as they try desperately to hold onto their relationship out of fear that it will end if they don’t constantly check in with their partner or keep tabs on them at all times.
What are the risks of Obsessive Love Disorder?
People with OLD may experience fear of abandonment and extreme jealousy over their partner’s relationships with other people. They may also become overly possessive or clingy in relationships, trying to control their partner’s behavior or activities. This type of behavior can harm any connection between partners, making them feel trapped or suffocated in the relationship instead of supported and loved. In some cases, OLD might even lead to physical abuse if left unchecked.
Obsessive Love Disorder (OLD) is a serious condition that affects many people around the world. It has been studied by psychiatrists, psychologists, and other mental health experts since 1981 when it was first identified. OLD is characterized by an excessive desire for love and closeness from another person to the point of obsession, which can cause severe emotional distress for both the individual suffering from OLD and their loved ones.
Other risks associated with OLD can be ranging from depression and anxiety to physical health problems caused by unhealthy behaviors such as drug use or self-harm. Individuals with OLD often engage in stalking behavior, attempting to maintain constant contact with the object of their affection even if it becomes uncomfortable or dangerous for both parties. Those suffering from OLD may also experience financial difficulties due to constantly buying gifts or taking trips to keep their beloved’s attention.
How to stop being obsessed with someone
Being obsessed with someone can lead to feelings of anxiety and insecurity as well as an unhealthy preoccupation with them. Here are some tips on how to stop being so focused on someone and take back control of your life.
The first step is recognizing the feeling when it appears. Becoming aware of how you’re feeling towards somebody allows you to better understand the root causes behind why you feel the way you do. And, acknowledge the emotions that come with the thought of this person, and allow yourself to feel them without judgment or shame. This will help in creating emotional distance between yourself and this person.
Then try distracting yourself with activities that don’t involve thinking about them – spend time with friends or family, pick up a new hobby, or volunteer in your community. It’s best to engage in activities that will fill up your time such as hobbies or sports that will bring you joy and make it easier to stop obsessing over someone.
The key here is to replace the excessive thoughts about someone with something more joyful and productive. Allow your brain to experience excitement from other things too, and slowly detach your happiness from the person you are obsessed with. This will help you to form new habits and lessen the compulsive thoughts to check out what they are doing. You have to divert the focus back to yourself, your life, your passion, and to your well-being.