Welcome to my guide on how to talk dirty.
There are 4 easy ways to dirty talk. First, you can start by expressing your sexual desires. Then, you can give sexual praise and have a naughty roleplay with your partner. Last but not least, you can ask flirty questions to arouse his/her sexual desires.
If you are new, worry not. You will learn more about the dirty conversation in the following sections.
Why Dirty Talk Matters In A Relationship
Dirty talk may feel strange if you have never done it before.
However, it plays a vital role in creating sexual tension and expressing what you like and wants in a relationship. Just view it as creative self-expression, and you will be able to do it naturally.
Here are the three advantages of dirty talk:
1) It stimulates the brain
It triggers the hearing sensation and imagination before you are physically intimate. Lacing sex with fantasy and anticipation during foreplay can significantly enhance the erotic experience in bed.
2) Increase the sexual pleasure
While you are having physical intimacy, the creative expression of what you love from your partner makes the overall experience unique and more exciting. This can significantly increase her/his desire to want more from you and magnify the orgasm effect towards the end of sex.
3) For deep connection
The verbal expression of you needing your love partner will make her/him feel good and appreciated. Taking the initiative to share desires and feelings will help you open up more, be more transparent with each other, and create a special bond. You will be able to make your partner keep thinking of you all the time, and can’t wait to see you.
How To Dirty Talk: 4 Easy Ways
If you are a total beginner, here are a few easy tricks you can use to start dirty talk with confidence. I have also given in some practical examples which you can apply in real life easily.
Method#1: Describe your desires
When you are not in bed, you can still dirty talk by expressing what you want from your partner.
Dirty Talk examples:
- I can’t wait to [sexual activity] tonight.
- When you get here, I’m going to [sexual activity].
- I need you and your [sexy part] so bad.
- I have been naughty today. I keep thinking about [sexual activity] with you.
Method#2: Praise your partner
Let your partner feel appreciated and aroused by giving him/her genuine praise.
Dirty Talk examples:
- The way how you [sexual activity] really makes me hot.
- I like it when you moan [or things he/she does]. That’s so sexy.
- I like your [sexy part]. Just looking at it makes me horny.
Roleplay can spark excitement because it allows both of you to start fantasizing about something forbidden.
Dirty Talk examples:
- I’m sick. I think I need some “special treatment” tonight. Can you take good care of me, please?
- The math is so hard. Can you teach me how to do it tonight? I will massage you in return.
- I’m hungry. Please feed me something now. I think need some milk.
Method#4: Asking flirty questions
This helps to set the mood right and invite your partner to enjoy the moment with you.
Dirty Talk examples:
- Which one makes you hornier? Missionary or doggy style?
- I’m touching myself. Do you want to give me a hand?
- What do you want me to do for you when you are about to orgasm?
- I can do anything for you tonight. Tell me your wish, my queen.
Dirty Text Messages For The Person You Like
If you are away and you cannot meet your partner, you can still talk dirty with her/him on the phone. It can still spark imagination and make him/her think about you all the time.
You can personalize the messages below to match your current relationship.
Dirty Talk Messages:
- I miss your warmth and smell.
- I wish I can hold you right now.
- I can’t wait to see you again. This time I am going to [sexual activity].
- I want to play with your pussy and eat it up when I’m back.
- Imagining you naked makes me hard.
- I want to see you playing with yourself while [sexual activity].
- I’m unbuttoning your shirt now. Then, I’m going to push you to my bed and start doing naughty things to you.
How To Dirty Talk With A Girl
Please only do this if you have flirted with her and she is obviously into you. If you do it in the early relationship phase, it may backfire.
If you want to talk dirty with a girl without sounding embarrassed yourself, you should start flirting with her first. If she does not reject you or she flirts back, you know it is okay for you to cross the line of just being a friend. In other words, she wants more from you. Then, you can start to escalate to dirty talks or physical touches.
When you dirty talk with a girl, you should say it casually like it is not a big deal. Imply that we are all adults, and it is totally okay to talk dirty.
If you are being too cautious and nervous when you say it, it will make you look too intentional and try hard. So, just say it as if you didn’t plan for it, and you are just saying whatever pops up in your mind.
If this is your first time trying to dirty talk to a girl, you should start with the most straightforward way first, which is by praising her.
You can praise how sexy she looks, her boobs, her ass, and the way how she gazes is driving you crazy. Again, I warn you that you only want to start giving sexual compliments if she is obviously into you and enjoying flirting with you.
Praise her for being sexy:
- I like your skin tone. It’s very healthy and sexy at the same time.
- I like your neck part and your collarbone. It’s very sexy. But, don’t worry, I’m not a vampire. I won’t bite you. Maybe, just licking.
- I’m sorry. I was just checking out your butt. That’s so sexy. Ops, I just looked at it again.
- Do you know what the sexiest curve you have is? Your smile. Erm… actually, what I wanted to say is your sexy ass.
- I like your cleavage. It is so sexy and deep. Can I dive into it?
- You smell good. I want to taste you.
How To Talk Dirty With A Guy
It is not that different from talking dirty with a girl. Just let him know that you need him and be submissive, and he will be totally turned on.
You can say something like, I want you to touch me and squeeze my boobs gently, or I want you to hug me and tell me I’m all yours.
Make him feel he is needed, and you are ready to have him, and he will be aroused.
Erotic Things To Say During Sex
There are many things you can say during sex. To make it easier for you, I categorize them into foreplay, during physical intimacy, and after orgasm.
Erotic things to say during foreplay:
- I want to see you play with yourself.
- I want you to undress me.
- I want you to rub against me like this.
- Please kiss my body. I beg you.
- Play with my cock/pussy until I say stop.
- Come here. I want to suck you. Give it to me.
Dirty talks during sex:
- Choke me.
- Grab my ass.
- Hug me tight.
- Look at me. Call my name.
- I need you. Please give me more.
- You are so good. Can you fuck me harder, baby?
- Your pussy/cock feels amazing. It’s so soft and warm.
- I love the way you fuck me. You are amazing.
Erotic phrases after orgasm:
- Your pussy/cock is incredible. I love you so much.
- You are amazing in bed. I want to do this with you every day.
- Your tongue and touch are magical.
- I need more. Feed me your boobs/cock.
How To Talk Dirty On The Phone
I highly suggest you talk dirty in person, but you can still talk dirty over the phone if you are in a long-term relationship.
It is not that hard to talk dirty on the phone. First, you let your imagination goes wild, and then you just need to describe it in words.
Here’s a dirty talk over the phone example:
I’m always thinking of you. I would like to play with your hands and your hair. Then, I want to move you closer to me, and I want to bite your ear and kiss you on the lips. I want to kiss you so intensely and taste your tongue. Then, I want to smell your neck, and slowly move down to your boobs, and your abs, and softly kiss your pussy/cock. I decided I want to start licking it. So, I take off your pants now, and I put my head in your thighs. I start licking it gently. It is so yummy. This makes me so hard/horny. I can’t hold it anymore. I need more of you now. I want to fuck you now…
Random Sexy Things To Say To Your Partner
Below are some phrases you can tell or text your partner. You can adjust it to match your needs.
Dirty Talk Examples:
- I’m craving for your pussy/cock. I can’t focus on anything else today.
- Imagining stripping you naked makes me feel so hot.
- I like ice cream, and I’m good at licking. I can lick you too if you want.
- I want to touch you and kiss you all over with my lips.
- I want to hug you and smell you so badly.
- I’m so gonna throw you on the bed and make you beg for more.
- I like it when you ride me and your tits bounce hard.
- I want you to bend over, so I can go deep in you.
- I want you to be on top. I’m yours. You can do anything you want with me.
- I like to go to the gym with you. It always turns me on when I see you sweating.
- Let’s play a game. But, if you lose, you will have to take off your bra.
- When you come over, wear your office dress without panties.
- I want you to grab me when I’m driving.
- Let’s go camping. I want to be naughty with you in the tent.
- I like it when you wear a dress. I can do it from behind right away without taking off your clothes.
- Let me give you a massage from head to shoulder and from shoulder to pussy/cock.
- You look really sexy when you do this posture.
- Kiss me three times, and I will let you do whatever you want tonight.
- Do you know how hard/wet I’m right now?
- Will you feel offended if I start sucking your pussy/cock right now?
- I need your help with something in my bedroom. Can you please give me a hand?
- I had a wild fantasy about you last night. I want to make it real today.
- You are naughty. I need to spank you so you will be obedient again.
- Can I lick your pussy/can I give you a blow job, my queen/king?
- If you open your legs wide enough, I promise I will bang you harder.
How To Talk Dirty If You Are Shy
You are not alone if you have anxiety over dirty talk.
I assure you, once you shifted your mindset about it, you will be able to overcome the shyness and be able to express your true feelings creatively.
Below are the 2 most essential mindsets to help you to become smoother at dirty talk.
Mindset 1: It is a natural thing to praise your partner’s sexual performance
Telling your partner that you love them and how amazing they are is vital in a relationship. When they bring you immense pleasure, let them know that they are amazing. It will arouse their desire and make them want to give you more.
If you enjoy the hugs, touch, kisses, and sex with them, you should express it, and her know that you want more of her.
Direct and honest communication like this will help her open up to you in return, and she will let you know what she wants too. This provides a positive feedback loop, and both of you will understand and fulfill each other’s needs better in the long term.
Mindset 2: Sex and love are inseparable
I understand that in some cultures or religions, talking about sex is considered taboo. They shame people who talk about it, and they view people who have sex before marriage as slut or playboys.
But, let’s be real and be truly honest with ourselves. Sexual desire is one of the most natural desires that everyone has. In fact, I would consider it not just merely a desire but an actual need.
So, I just want you to adopt a new mindset that you have full rights to express your sexual needs, and talking about sex is not something shameful. Dirty talk and sex can spice up your relationship and creates a strong bond. So, you should do more of it.
However, you want to learn what turns your partner on and off, so you won’t cross the limit. This way, both of you will be able to enjoy sexual activity and communication to the max.
The Bottom Line On How To Dirty Talk
If you are a total beginner, you can always start by praising your partner. Just let them know how sexy and unique they are. However, if you are uncomfortable about it, then, by all means, you can drop it anytime you want. You don’t have to force it.