Welcome to my guide on how to start a conversation with someone you like.
You will discover how to talk to her for the first time and get her phone number.
I have also listed many fantastic conversation starters for you to talk to the person you like.
Let’s dive right into the content.

How To Start A Conversation With Someone You Like – The First Time
The goal of the first-time conversation is very simple.
You should probably aim to get her name. And, if you are more confident, you can try to get her phone number too.
I will show you how.
Step 1: How To Get Her Name
There are a few ways for you to get her name, and it depends on if this is the first time you see her or if you have met her a few times previously.
If you see her for the very first time:
- Hi, I know it’s random, but I thought you are cute/charming/adorable, and I wanted to introduce myself. My name is John. What’s your name?
- Hi, I believe we haven’t met before. I’m John. What’s your name?
- Hi, how are you? I’m new here, and my name is John. What’s your name?
If you have seen her a few times before:
Hi, I have seen you around but didn’t get the chance to know you. I’m John. What’s your name?
I would suggest using the direct introduction method, which I have shared above, whenever you can. This is because the direct method shows that you are a more confident person, you do not beat around the bush because of shyness when you want to get to know someone.
If you are not comfortable with being too direct, you can start with small talk first. Then, after you exchange a few words, you can introduce yourself.
Indirect Conversation Examples:
(At the gym)
You: The class is tiring, but it’s fun, right?
She: Yeah, I enjoyed it.
You: I can do this every week. By the way, I’m John. What’s your name?
She: I’m Melissa.
You: Are you into any other kind of sports?
(Conversation continues…)
After you have initiated a conversation, you want to introduce yourself directly. And, if she seems friendly and open to having a more extended conversation with you, you can try to get her phone number too.
Step 2: How To Get Her Phone Number:
You: You seem like a fun person. Maybe we can grab a drink together sometime. What do you think?
She: Sure.
You: Ok. Let’s exchange numbers, then. I will text you later.
That’s it. Always keep things simple when you introduce yourself and when you try to get her number.
First-Time Conversation Starters
You can use this list of conversation starters if this is your first time talking to someone you like or it has been a long time since your last catch up with her.
Conversation Starters: General openers with a stranger
- Hi, I’ve seen you around but didn’t get the chance to know you. My name is John. What’s yours?
- Where are you from?
- What brought you here?
- How long have you been staying here?
- It has been quite a while. Working on anything exciting lately?
- Any exciting plans for the weekend?
- I know it’s random. Wanna have brunch together this Sat?
Conversation Starters: Passion
- What’s your passion?
- What get you started?
- What is your favorite part about it?
- What is the most challenging part about it?
- Do you work on the passion alone?
- What do you need to get started?
Conversation Starters: Sports
- Are you into any indoor or outdoor sports?
- Where do you go for [sports]?
- You [sports] with your family or friends?
- Do you go for [sports] every week?
- What get you started?
- What do you like the most about it?
Conversation Starters: Books
- Do you like to read?
- What are you reading lately?
- What did you learn from it so far?
- Any good books to recommend to me?
- Who is your favorite author?
- What is your favorite book so far? Why?
- What is your favorite quote?
- How many books have you collected?
- Do you mind if I take a look at your book collection sometime?
Conversation Starters: Talent
- Do you have any hidden talents which I don’t know yet?
- Do you know how to play any musical instrument?
- How long have you been learning [the talent]?
- What makes you fall in love with it?
- What inspires you to get started with [the talent]?
Conversation Starters: Traveling
- Are you into traveling?
- Where have you been so far?
- What is your favorite country?
- Which country would you revisit again? Why?
- Which countries are on top of your travel list?
- If you had the VIP ticket to go anywhere you want now, where would you go?
- Do you enjoy a packed traveling journey or a very relaxing one?
- Do you like to travel with friends or family, or alone?
- What is the funniest thing that has ever happened to you while traveling?
Conversation Starters: Personality
- Would you consider yourself an extrovert or an introvert?
- Are you a cat person or a dog person?
- What is your favorite color? Have you heard of color personality?
- Have you done any personality tests? What does it tells about you?
- What is the most common compliment that you get?
- What do you like the most about yourself?
- What kind of strengths do you wish to have?
- What habits would you like to develop?
- What is your zodiac sign?
Conversation Starters: Life
- What is your life philosophy?
- What do you think is the most essential thing in life?
- What is your biggest goal in life?
- What is your perfect day look like?
- Would you trade 10 years of your life for 1 million?
- What is your dream life?
- What advice would you give to your 12-year-old self?
- What are the things you wished you had made a different choice in life?
Conversation Starters: Happiness
- How do you define happiness?
- What makes you happy in life?
- Anything happens lately that makes you happy?
- Would you sacrifice your own happiness for your family?
- What makes you happy when you’re a kid?
- Do you think happiness has become more complicated after we have grown up?
Conversation Starters: Relationship
- What is an essential thing in a relationship?
- What kind of person is your ideal type?
- What makes a person attractive to you?
- Do you believe in love at first sight?
- Do you believe in living together before marriage?
- What does marriage mean to you?
- What makes you feel loved and appreciated?
- What is your love language?
- Are you willing to sacrifice for your relationship?
- What are the things you would like to accomplish together?
Fun Conversation Starters
- If you have to live on an isolated island for 3 months and only bring 3 items with you, what would you bring along with you?
- If you could choose between teleportation or the power to read the future, which would you choose?
- If you could only live for the next 48 hours, what would you do?
- If you could live anywhere in the world you want, where would you pick?
- If you could choose your natural talent, what would you choose?
- If you could start over again, what decision would you make differently?
Extra Tips On How To Start A Conversation With Someone You Like
Here are some tips to follow when you start a conversation with someone who is new to you.
1) Do Not Jump Around Topics Too Much
After you find a suitable topic that she is interested in, you should just stick with it and expand the conversation around it.
This is why I’ve categorized the conversation starters in the above section for you. You can use the questions listed to go deeper into the chosen topic.
2) Stay Cool She Is Not Open To Make Friends
If a girl refuses to talk to you, you should just keep calm and walk away. There’s really no need to attack her with words, no matter how impolite she is. Take it as her loss for not being able to become your friend.
3) Do Not Send Follow Up Message
If you managed to get her number and sent her a text, but she didn’t reply to you, please do not send her a follow-up message and ask her why she didn’t answer.
You do not want to show up as a needy person, do you?
If she did not reply, then just take it as she is too busy at the moment and you should just leave her alone. Wait a few more days before you send her another message again.
The Bottom Line On How To Start A Conversation With Someone You Like
Starting and having a conversation should always be fun.
If you find it hard to talk to her or she is reluctant to speak to you, then you should probably excuse yourself and leave. There’s really no point in forcing a conversation that you know will lead to nowhere.
You might as well invest your time and effort in the next person who can resonate better with you.